There’s a Mexican Sausage in my Arepa

What’s better than large Mexican sausage?

Nothing! Nothing is better than Mexican sausage. Chorizo makes the world go round. Chorizo is everything. Obviously the only way to make this fine piece of mystery meat better is to add more fat. Huevos Rancheros? I think so. 

The first step in making this pile of fat is cutting up the sausage. There’s something super cathartic about tearing through a phallic piece of intestine. I highly recommend blasting angry Alanis Morisette music in the background while doing this.

Isn’t it Ironic. don’t you think?    


Mexican sausage really gets my pan wet. Seriously though, it gets my pan all wet. Do NOT add any extra oil. Yea, I’m talking to you fatty. PUT THE OIL DOWN. I promise that the fat in the chorizo is more than enough to keep those thunder thighs.


Break out the beans! With a slotted spoon, put the chorizo on a plate and keep the grease in the pan. As a side note, I usually keep the scariest knife I can find in eyesight throughout the whole cooking process. It establishes my authority in the kitchen.  


Pour the beans and liquid into the same pan used to cook the chorizo. Add one packet of Sazon and some dried coriander to taste. Bring to a boil and let simmer. Don’t over cook! There should be enough liquid left over to smother the arepa\corn tortilla. 


How do you like your eggs in the morning? Fried, bitch! Fry an egg for each plate.  


Arepa! Arepa! Arepa dough is made by adding boiled water and butter to a bowl of masa harina. Once the masa harina absorbs the liquid it turns into a malleable dough. AGH! What am I saying?! It was such a waste of time. Just buy a fucking package of corn tortillas and call it a day. 


 Layer everything on the plate in this order- Corn tortilla- saucy beans- cooked chorizo- slice of queso fresco (It’s a cheese!)- fried egg. Serve with a little avocado and a fake Spanish accent.   








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